me weird.

i just don’t know how to show i care. :/

grandpa came down to talk to me,
being very happy and stuff..
he told me he had this thanksgiving dinner while i was in china..
(post bdae dinner too..)

3 tables, 36 people (no, duhh my mum wasn’t there are you stupid?)
and that he gave a speech (i guess principals are all good at that)
and that he was thankful that both andrea and isaac could be there cos we’ve grown up, all so busy and stuff, and i couldn’t be there..
and then he read the card i made for him (hand written, in blue ink only, neatest handwriting possible)..
and like, he was very happy..

so while listening.. i just uh, listened, smiled, laughed. i didn’t know what to do. :s
i feel so useless and stupid now..

and apparently, my mum told alll my relatives present today (qing ming jie thingy) about me hunting down my gong gong and stuff..
yeh she told me she told them. :/

okay, for the above 2 situations, how do i act?
i know i’m like ‘filial’ and blablaa.
but how do i react to the uhh ‘praises’ or whatever its called?

me, being, me.
the damn durian..
i just don’t know how to react..

and most of the time, i dont. thus seeming so so cold hearted.
thus…
people think ‘this woman, do so nice thing, then later react like that, damn -_- leh dont know what she’s thinking’

now, really.
i dont know why i react like that either, can? :/

sorry.

bottom line is.
it may seem that i don’t care, but i do.
i might seem all nonchalant on the outside but inside, i’m thinking of what i can actually do.
just cos i dont have some required action (like if lets say someone is sad, everyone goes round that person and i dont), it doesnt mean i dont care.
i do.
sometimes, or rather, most, i just DONT KNOW how to show it.

i’m still a girl, after all.

sometimes, i get really scared..
scared i’ll be my dad.

he cares a lot, he just doesn’t know how to show it.
and i think i’m actually somewhat like him.

maybe that’s why everyone tells me ‘you’re so much like your dad’

oh well, if it floats your boat, fine by me.
i’m happy the way i am.
(=

the good, the bad, which is it?

so uh, hi?
random emotionally thoughts.

so um,
just like pachaa, i believe that there’s some good in everyone.
eg. how we’d show care for friends.. sacrifice..

but then, the contradicting part.
no one can be fully trusted, cos they’re always plotting evil stuff at the back of their minds. eg. how to be better in this and that, how to uh, i dont know..

which brings me to my point.
how should we exactly treat people?

sometimes i get so confused, i lock myself up. :/
you do nice things for people, they never remember.
do something bad and woahhh, its there for life.

thus.?

i don’t know, i’m still confused…

comments, anyone?
:/

boy oh boy, i really need some clearing. :/

grrrr.

irritating, maybe my patience has worn off..

random: it seems you dont want to chat with me
char: you are thinking too much, hello
random: cos you are quiet
char: i’m doing other stuff, i can’t be talking all the time, can i?
random: i thought you are online,and should be free.

well, maybe i won’t come online.? :/

moods swinging from tree to tree.

sweet niblets.

you know,
i really miss the past, of my class.
how we’d like, really do a lot of stuff together,
and be close..
and laugh and read each other’s blogs and comment and stuff..

we don’t get that anymore..
it’s a little ‘to each his own’
and it kinda sucks..

but we all gotta move on with our lives, dont we? (=
although it’d be good, to be as one again.

newlayout for wordpress

hi uh.
there’s a new layout for wordpress,
son’t really like it, more complicated,
something my brain would never coprehand. hurrrrr.

went to school to paint our arm bands, then practise the dance..
then i went home to sleep. :/
very tired, not sure why.

damn weather, urghhh.

went to buy bedding for hamsters and when i came back i saw whiskers on his bottle. )=
he climbed onto the house, then from the house, climbed onto the bottle and he’s so so fit. he was biting the wire that hangs the bottle, desperately trying to climb out.

so i exchanged the house and the toilet’s placing,
but am still worried,
cos whiskers is a smart rat once he know’s how to climb, he’ll go all out and keep using that same path, and then try out new paths, never giving up :/

he climbed onto the house again, and tried, but there wasn’t any lead.

well, my hamsters are doing fine, in case you’re wondering. (=
except whiskers is a lil :/
sigh… )=

umm, nothing much i guess..
today is not an interesting day in the life of a tai. ho. :/

had a dream..
hmm, oh wel.

timetable.

click for a larger view, but i’m pretty sure you get the picture…

now cry with me people.
and chant that school’s gonna be a bitch..

forgive me.

nicked this from josh’s blog.
no, not twin’s blog.
twin would NEVER have that picture up. lol.

no, i’m not (that much of) a pervert, but this is such a turn on, too good to be missed.
hehe.

share the love people!

isn’t that picture totally gorgeous?

i think i should brush up on my spelling,
as a mate just said ‘your typos like free one sia’

siannn.
shall google kissing guys, but i’m not that bored, maybe next time..

having fun chatting, as usual (=
love.

brotherhood.

weird. :/
happened on the same day, just only.
up to you to decide if tis good or bad,
but good for me lah! (=

drumming on sat! says: (2:12:24 AM)
girls like u enjoy hanging out with guys

drumming on sat! says: (2:12:24 AM)
cos u talk like us

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that’s 1…
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^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:10:02 AM)
we early early brother le

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:13:10 AM)
cant imagine we together anyway

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:13:15 AM)
haha

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:13:18 AM)
ME ALSO

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:13:23 AM)
walau totally brotherhood cannot tgt pls

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:13:32 AM)
haha

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:13:49 AM)
of course la

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:14:21 AM)
if really tgt i dun even know we will do wad tgt sia

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:14:58 AM)
play pool..

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:15:00 AM)
sell uniform..

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:15:03 AM)
wah

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:15:05 AM)
watch crayonshinchan

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:15:19 AM)
vvery couple activites sia

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:16:06 AM)
i cannot imagine kissing you please.. 

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:21 AM)
fk off 1st sia

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:16:27 AM)
me?

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:30 AM)
ya

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:33 AM)
haha

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:35 AM)
kiss me

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:16:37 AM)
WA THANKS SIA 

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:37 AM)
nah

Charmaine. [HEYSEXY.] says: (2:16:39 AM)
NO THANKYOU

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:43 AM)
haha

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:16:53 AM)
i kiss u like gay feeling lor

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:17:33 AM)
okok

^L@0_+3cK^_^Ah_hW@_D3k_D3k= says: (2:17:41 AM)
dun talk abt that le
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i guess quite some of my older guy friends (as in those i’ve known for a longer time..)
dont exactly treat me like a girl..
but more of a guy..
except that if they have girl problems they come to me,
cos i talk like them, yet i think like a girl (err i’m a girl, right?)
i guess in this aspect,
i have the best of both worlds, in terms of guy friendships..
ONLY I CANNOT GO OUT WHEN THEY HAVE THEIR STUPID BOYS NIGHT OUT AND PICKING UP GIRLS. GRRR.
but i don’t know if treating me as a guy is a good thing.. hmm..

well i guess, good for now!
only when i’m 30, single and sagging, then treating me as a guy would be a bad thing. haah.

pek chek.

loading pics on friendster is so. omg. :/
like totally not slow at all please…

wanna upload 1 photo, must like upload 5 times..
damn pekchek…
silly friendster. :/

OH! I SAW MY STALKER yesterday! (we stalk each other, so we’re both stalkers and stalkees at the same time..)
HELLO!
i’m so not dao.. (=

wooahh.

read on a mate’s blog,
something about goggling, ring and index fingers for women..

and about the ring finger being longer than an index,
it kidna means you’re ‘gay’, meaning lesbian, in terms of women. :/

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my ring finger is longer than my index eh,
how???

it’s not true right :/

well, its def not.