stress


i haven’t felt stressed in many months, maybe even a year or so.
usually i just keep calm and all.

but now i am majorly stressed.
it’s probably an 8 on a scale of 1 to 10.
i don’t know what 10 will be, i don’t know if this 8 would change.

but it’s bugging me and the stress has been increasing.
friends tell me i could take a year off, no use rushing deadlines just so i can continue studying..

but how if, just 2 days ago, i’ve made up my mind already?
i don’t know if it’s the correct path, but i’m hoping it is.

sometimes things don’t work my way and i begin to think why isn’t God there for me why isn’t he answering my prayers and all.
but i fail to realise he probably has answered it, it’s just that his path made for me is different from the path i want to take.

but i’m praying so hard right now that the path i want to take, is the path he wants me to take. it’d take my mind off some stuff, really.

i don’t know how long i can take this anymore, maybe because i’m very used to getting answers quickly. whether it’s a yes or a no, at least i still have the answers.

but right now i’m just, waiting.
it’s not a yes, it’s not a no,
i don’t even know what to call it.

i’m still hanging on but this is making me really, really tired. i’m not sure if i’m making the right decision so i’ll just hold onto it.

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