Life on ok Cupid, and my idea for a similar app

So a bff of mine (shy I’m lookin at you) told me about ok Cupid and I thought to myself, “huh? Can laugh at more people?” So ok lor!

Uploaded my profile: used this pic, I know, quite a fraud since I have straight hair. And I’m so not demure looking.
And here’s the profile, so you can’t say I’m cheating guys lol. 

Even a major disclaimer telling stupid people not to message me…

Then I got real stupid messages and had to get crafty with my replies. Here are some types of guys I met. 

The one with tacky pick up line  
The one with his face in his ass  

The one who was upfront

The King of bragging 

This was his face btw, congrats Roger. I hope you get girls coming to (or should I say on) you.  

The one who has a lot of self confidence  

His reply to that was “my face is perfection”. Man, Gotta give him marks for trying.

The one with ridiculous lines.

Clearly knew how to ‘rub’ me the wrong way lol.

The one who confused me  

The judgemental asshole

The one who loves to eat
The one who starts a convo by making it seem I should speak to him because I have no life  

The day I realised that visiting a page could have disastrous results


Anyway, I did meet a few ‘decent’ people there lah, I’m using decent in a loose way because they’re decent as long as they don’t creep me out or ask for sex or anything.

After using this app, I can finally plan my dating app for christians! It would be called… -drumroll plz-

Ok pulpit

Genius right. Here are the features (mimicking ok cupid’s)

1) type of christian, and if the denomination is important

2) name of church you attend

3) questions to filter people, example; which is your fav verse, biggest betrayer featured in the bible, potential names for your kids, discussing judas’ life, favourite way of partaking in the holy communion 

4) churches and bible study groups near you so that you guys can date and pray together lol

5) instead of pressing the heart button, you press a cross cos ykno, Jesus died for us and we must be reminded of it!

6) instead of pick up lines users should start with a bible verse or prayer 

And I’m done. Pretty cool app, plus it is downright hilarious. Somebody give me an award already.

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