The Amazing Race for Tampons


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This is gonna be an embarrassing story. But here goes.

So… from my previous post.. I was feeling CRAPPY. Because. period.

So I told tito (cab uncle) to drive us to BQ Mall in Tabgilaran, before dropping us off at Panglao. Told him to give me an hour, even though like, buying tampons takes 10mins?

Anyhoo, got to the supermarket, aimed for the pads/tampons aisle. FOUND NO TAMPONS. fuck. asked the staff and they said they ran out of tampons. i’d have to try the pharmacy.

Went to pharmacy.
Cashier: We ran out of tampons. Try the supermarket.
Me: the supermarket asked me to comer here!!! where can I go?
Cashier: Try the pharmacy opposite the mall…

Dragged F across the road, went to the pharmacy, SAME SHIT. DIFFERENT DAY. RAN OUT OF TAMPONS.

Me: Hi do you sell tampons?
Person: sold out
Me: -wants to punch them with my ovaries- Where can I buy them?
Person: across the street, try another pharmacy.

Imagine having this conversation 10 times. not even kidding.
COME ON BOHOL, ALL YOU WOMEN GOT PERIOD AT THE SAME TIME OR WHAT?

I was getting really frustrated. Funny enough, there were pharmacies on every street, beside each other, across the road… every turn, you’ll see pharmacies.. WITHOUT TAMPONS. WHAT IS THIS.

Wa you can almost see smoke coming out from my orifice. Well, except the vagina. It already has blood coming out, we don’t need to curse it with smoke.

And just when I wanted to give up, one lady told me there was ONE watsons store that I could try…

I don’t know what happened but suddenly Watsons was full of people shouting Tampons! Tampons! Tampons! Some sick joke or something? It seriously sounded like this

I stood there, not sure if I wanted to cry or die on the spot. Turned to F who was standing by the door like a bodyguard and grimaced. T_T

Left dejectedly. T_T REALLY? GAN SUAY? We (or rather, I) accepted that I wasn’t gna be buying any tampons T_T

Me: How am I going to dive?? I don’t have enough tampons on me
F: It’s ok, maybe we’ll get to see some sharks
Me: NOT FUNNY.
F: okok maybe they will have in Panglao. it’s a beach area. more tourists…

Sulked my way to Panglao, and this time we stayed at Captain’s Lodge in Alona. Put our stuff down, saw an angmoh girl working in the motel, and asked if she had tampons I could buy off her. Yea desperate times call for desperate measures ok.

Me: do you have any tampons I can buy from you? they don’t sell any here and I’m having my period and I’m going diving
Girl: Yea.. they don’t use tampons here. Filipinas believe that if they use tampons their vaginas will expand
Me: WHAT. WTF. R U KIDDING. erm do u have any then?
Girl: I can check if I have them at home, and bring some for you if I do..
Me: Ok thanks so much. I’ll pay you. I am guessing they don’t sell tampons here then..
Girl: You can try this one korean mart.. they may have it..

It was about 6pm by then, sky was getting dark. MY MOOD WAS AS DARK AS CMYK 000000 ok.

Went into the mart, COULDN’T FIND THE TAMPONS. OH MY GOODNESS WANTED TO CRY… was leaving when..

(note: mine was pink, not blue. lol)

F: char. is this the one?
Me: looks at the box OMG F I LOVE YOU THESE ARE TAMPONS!! YAYYYYY

Grabbed a box immediately and ran to the counter.

Cashier: Do you really need them? They’re expensive..
Me: yes i do! how much are they?
Cashier: 550P (~S$17)
Me: WHAT THE FUCK. ARE YOU SERIOUS. I NEED THEM ))=

And so.. I walked out of the shop 550P poorer, vagina aching, heart aching even more. BUT HEY I HAVE TAMPONS. My mood was super good after that ok. Nothing could get me down (except when I felt like an SPG, more on that later).

Moral of story: ALWAYS. ALWAYS. Pack one whole mth’s worth of tampons with you, even if it’s unlikely that your period’s coming during your travel period. Or you’ll spend your life savings on it while on holiday.

-post credit scene wtf-

I ended up buying TWO boxes during my trip. The box had 10, and I used it in two days, cos I’d change after every dive.

Me: I need another box. Lemme see if this -random shop we passed- place has it
F: ok
Me: hey they have it here. i’m gna pay.
F: how much is it?
Me: 500P.. ex but no choice.
F: don’t buy here. 500P but only has 8 pieces. the korean mart is 550P but 10 pieces. u may need more. n cheaper. let’s go.

T_T So that was how I spent $33 on tampons in bohol… Thanks ah Philippines… I’m never complaining about how expensive tampons are in singapore…

(side note: huge thanks to F for being a gem. accompanying me to all the damn pharmacies and putting up with my whining. he rly didn’t have to considering all factors. he’s on holiday and i was ruining it by making him go tampon-hunting. Eternally glad his friend wasn’t with us, I’ll feel horrible for wasting two people’s time)

One response to “The Amazing Race for Tampons

  1. Pingback: Diving in Panglao: Balicasag, Pamilacan, and local dives | You KNOW I'm Hot.

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